10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
- "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
- Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
- Fish don't eat Nutz!
- Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
- "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses."
Alex Powers
- I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
- (after a particularly bad beat)
"that was a terrible call"
"it's called gambling"
"no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
- "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em."
Johnnie Moss
- Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.