10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.