10 Random Poker Quotes

• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.