10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "No river, no fish."
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright