10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"