10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)