10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.