10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.