10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant