10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion