10 Random Poker Quotes

• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.