10 Random Poker Quotes

• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.