10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Poker is for loners.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.