10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."