10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'