10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."