10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. - unknown