10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson