10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss