10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs