10 Random Poker Quotes

• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!