10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob