10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!