10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.