10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.