10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-