10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls