10 Random Poker Quotes

• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss