10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.