10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers