10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.