10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Wise man say, "man who seeks revenge, should did two graves" ActionDave
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.