10 Random Poker Quotes

• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls