10 Random Poker Quotes

• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from