10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.