10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.