10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Those eggs smell delicious!