10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.