10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway