10 Random Poker Quotes

• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.