10 Random Poker Quotes

• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Welcome to kicker school
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..