10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."