10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.