10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."