10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.