10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "No river, no fish."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth