10 Random Poker Quotes

• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.