10 Random Poker Quotes

• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer