10 Random Poker Quotes

• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "No river, no fish."
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio