10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo